Obituary For The Late, Great Mr. Common Sense
We are not sure who presided over the funeral or who wrote his obituary but it was a very sad day when he passed away.
August 2017 | TheDogPress.com
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, who has been with us for many years. His name is Common Sense but no one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.
Mr. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). Reason was lost when he took a beating because he couldn't defend himself from a burglar in his home, knowing the burglar could sue him for assault.
His health began to deteriorate when well-intentioned but overbearing school house regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student worsened his condition. Common Sense lost more ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
The irony wasn't lost on him when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. In fact, when schools were forbidden to inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion he was on life support for over a month.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
The final blow to Mr. Common Sense was the death of his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife Discretion, his only daughter, Responsibility and his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.