Garden Snakes Can Be Dangerous
The Side Effect Of A Funny Thing Is Laughter
She finds a snake under the sofa, the husband gets down to look for it, the dog gets involved, neighbors, police and ambulance arrive and it's a side-splitting laugh a minute!
A couple in Sweetwater, Texas had a lot of potted plants. During the recent cold spell, the wife was bringing them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze. It turned out that a little green grass snake was hidden in one of the plants. After getting inside and all warmed up, it slithered out and when the wife saw it go under the sofa she let out a very loud scream.
The husband (who was taking a shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was. She told him there was a snake under the sofa.
He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it. About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the behind. He thought the snake had bitten him, so he fell over on the floor screaming.
His wife thought he had had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told him to lie still and called an ambulance.
The attendants rushed in, would not listen to his protests, loaded him on the stretcher, and started carrying him out.
About that time, the snake came out from under the sofa and the Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the stretcher. That's when the man broke his leg and why they kept him at the hospital.
The wife still had the problem of that snake in the house, so she called on a neighbor who volunteered to capture the snake. He armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch. Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief. But while relaxing, her hand on the cushions, she something wriggling, looked down and saw that snake coiling around her wrist.
She screamed and fainted, the snake rushed back under the sofa.
The neighbor man, seeing her lying there passed out, tried to use CPR to revive her.
The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.
The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that the snake had bitten him. She went to the kitchen and got a small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.
By now, the police had arrived.
They saw the unconscious man, smelled the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were about to arrest them all, when the women tried to explain how it all happened over a little garden snake!
The police called an ambulance to take away the injured neighbor and his sobbing wife.
Now, the little snake again crawled out from under the sofa and one of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it. He missed the snake and hit the leg of the end table. The table fell over, the lamp on it shattered and, as the bulb broke, it started a fire in the drapes.
The other policeman, trying to beat out the flames, fell through the window into the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped out and raced into the street, where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed into the parked police car.
Meanwhile, neighbors saw the burning drapes and called in the fire department. The firemen had started raising the fire ladder when they were halfway down the street. The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires, put out the power, and disconnected the telephones in a ten-square city block area (but they did get the house fire out).
Time passed. Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was repaired, the dog came home, the police acquired a new car and all was right with their world.
A while later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced a cold snap for that night. The wife asked her husband if he thought they should bring in their plants for the night.
And that's when he shot her.
Submit your Funny Effect, if used, you win a $50.00 certificate good on any NetPlaces Network site and be in the $200.00 CASH runoff in November. Just in time for Christmas!
Copyright © TheDogPress.com 200916111808 http://www.thedogpress.com/Funny/garden-snake-hysteria.asp
TheDogPlace.org for authoritative free DogCare information
If you breed or show dogs, get your news at TheDogPress.com
TheJudgesPlace.com especially for Judges, professional and owner handlers.