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HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE A DOG BREEDER?

 

Share your funny (or not) tip-offs because our writer thinks she might have missed a few clues breeders or multiple dog owners know about…

 

Teresa Crisman, MorningStar Miniature Schnauzers

January 18, 2019

 

I have a King size bed so crowded I have to do contortions to lie down on it and I live alone.

 

 

There are other clues multiple dog owners can share with us, enter your tip-off COMMENT at the end of this page!

 

You find dog hair frozen inside a piece of ice.

 

We spend more on dog food than people food, hands down.

 

We observe a “No Shorts” rule because shin shredders are in residence.

 

If something hits the floor, it belongs to the dogs.

 

You bust your butt stepping on a tennis ball on the way to the restroom at night.

 

Best present EVER was a carpet cleaner.

 

The worst present was the one I stepped in on the way to the restroom in the dark, then hopping on the clean foot I landed in another 'present'. Holding on to the wall and hobbling on one clean heel, I am laughing hysterically but I quickly overcame it…

 

There's more dog grooming equipment and product than you use on yourself.

 

We make no overnight trips without an in-house dog sitter.

 

The maid’s uniform consists of coveralls and muck boots.

 

I had a chain link fence but my village made it illegal for dogs to breed in public view. So I’m holding the breeding pair in a tie (on the floor by the bed) and hear gagging sounds just as I get a warm wet feeling down my back from the one on the bed.

 

One day I’m sitting on the couch (my male is afraid of thunder) a boom hits so loud it shakes the windows. Before I could blink he had locked his legs around my head and neck!!! I couldn't open my mouth and laugh because, well guess what was in my face? Believe me, this wasn’t that funny…

 

Here are a few comments below we thought you'd appreciate, we know you have stories that everyone will appreciate too. Tell us how YOU know you are a dog owner/breeder… Response@TheDogPress.com

 

Tali said, "When my dogs bark, people back away from the door quickly. You have no idea the sound of a dozen dogs howling in chorus at 5am either..."

 

Terry Shinaberry (not funny but true) said "When you started noticing white PETA vans sitting outside your front gate or the tax man jumping up and down peeking his face over the privacy fence like kilroy was here, trying to counting the dogs in your yard."

 

Sharon said she was "glad you guys put a light on this 2 club members called me about lurkers. Why do we have to hide who we are?"

 

Gini Brydle told us "she's been trying to convince my husband dog hair in ice cubes is roughage."

 

Julie said you know you are a dog lover "When half of your pantry is full of dog food and dog treats and you have a freezer dedicated to hold dog bones and meat."

TheDogPress.com EST 2002 © Jan 2019 https://www.thedogpress.com/Funny/How-do-you-know-you-are-a-dog-breeder-tere19C01.asp

 

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SSI

 

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