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Redneck Medical Terminology

The Side Effect Of A Funny Thing Is Laughter

Sent in by Hank Dowling

 

Studies have demonstrated that some people have a lower stress rate because they don’t understand the seriousness of medical terminology.

 

 

Medical Term - Redneck Definition

Artery ~ The study of paintings

Bacteria ~ Back door to cafeteria

Barium ~ What doctors do when patients die

Benign ~ What you be, after you be eight

Caesarean ~ Section A neighborhood in Rome

CAT scan ~ Searching for Kitty

Cauterize ~ Made eye contact with her

Colic ~ A sheep dog

Coma ~ A punctuation mark

Dilate ~ To live long

Enema ~ Not a friend

Fester ~ Quicker than someone else

Fibula ~ A small lie

Impotent ~ Distinguished, well known

Labor Pain ~ Getting hurt at work

Medical Staff ~ A Doctor's cane

Morbid ~ A higher offer

Nitrates ~ Rates of pay for working at night, normally more money than days

Node ~ I knew it

Outpatient ~ A person who has fainted

Pelvis ~ Second cousin to Elvis

Post Operative ~ A letter carrier

Recovery Room ~ Place to do upholstery

Rectum ~ Nearly killed him

Secretion ~ Hiding something

Seizure ~ Roman Emperor

Tablet ~ A small table

Terminal Illness ~ Getting sick at the airport

Tumor ~ One plus one more

Urine ~ Opposite of you're out....

 

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